The Kosiba Algorithm

If request is received:

Step 1: Handle Request

If individual - ignore for as long as possible.

If community group - send in underling of minor importanct, such as deputy commissioner. This gives the illusion the Chicago Department of Sewers is really concerned.

Step 2: The underling can only take information. So what if he/she has no authorization to do anything. It's the illusion that counts.

Step 3: When questioned, underling can only say, "I can find out!" but in reality will never find out the truth.

Step 4: Go to step 1.